N-n-n-n-19

Somedays the diet is drudgery, sometimes it's just unappealing. Today was glorious in its routine quality. There was no temptation in Ruby's peanut butter sandwich (though the bugles in her lunch still got a raised eyebrow). Today was just a return to yesterday's breakfast—cucumbers, hummus and lox. The lox was in that interesting place right before it goes bad where it is completely devoid of taste. Its texture was like that of a piece of soft, but slippery fruit leather. I basically treated it like medicine and downed it. I may return to eggs tomorrow, but I needed a few days off. I have been reflecting a lot on the state of being heavy. Of being overweight. I can say it, of being and feeling fat. For a long time I thought it was my inevitable destiny. I now know that I need not embrace that particular destiny—for now. I may never be Antonio Banderas (don't ask why I picked him) but I know I can get to a much better place than I started at. I tell you, between the comments, looking at fat pictures (it's not just the picture that makes you look fat when you're fat) and the insurance—fat people cost more—you can really deny alot of evidence. Okay, I'm done with the bad eating until I retire. But don't ask me to give up gambling or cigars. I won't do it. And I won't clean off my desk either. I'm not THAT self-actualized.

Breakfast
Lox
Cucumbers
Hummus
Tea

Snackz
Cheese Stick
15 Almonds
15 Cashews
1 Carmel Nip

Lunch
Pork, Peppers, Cabbage & Carrots
Beef Stick

Dinner
Sirloin Hamburgers (90% Lean)
Asparagus
Pickles

Dessert
Skipped

I had such great luck at this new Chinese restaurant yesterday (Chik'n'Spinach) that I thought I would return there for Beef & Celery. What I ended up getting was Pork, Peppers, Cabbage and Carrots—and it was fantastic. I didn't notice at the time, but I suppose the dish had some—if not lots—of sugar in it. That's a SoBe no-no, even though they don't explicitly rule it out, sugar is something you should avoid. Otherwise, the dish was just spicy pork and vegetables AND IT WAS YUMMY. I horked it down like a seizurerific don downs little chocolates when confessing sins at the Vatican. I also got some Teriyaki beef, which I was forced to eat on the carride back from the Chinee place, I was so hungry. Surprisingly, I wasn't hungry the rest of the day, I just drank lots and lots of water. Because of the sugary lunch, I figured I owed it to myself to skip dessert tonight. Tomorrow I may seek out some pork rinds.